“I hate people.” A phrase I, along with many around me, utter far too often. I began to notice just how frequently this statement escaped my lips, sometimes multiple times a day. Since grounding myself, seeing my own light, and living in the present, the irony has become painfully clear. Because when I say “I hate people,” I’m essentially saying “I hate myself.” After all, I am human too.

Have you ever caught yourself expressing these negative sentiments? Or perhaps named a specific person you couldn’t stand? In reality, we are all mirrors reflecting each other. What we see in others is often a reflection of ourselves. So, when we say we dislike someone, we’re essentially saying there’s something within ourselves we don’t accept.

Nowadays, I’ve shifted my perspective. I now say, “I dislike the patterns people exhibit.” These patterns, often stemming from conditioning and ego-driven behavior, can indeed be frustrating. But I’ve learned the value of looking into this mirror. By being consciously present, standing in my own light, and grounding myself, I can recognize these patterns more quickly.

How to Recognize These Patterns:

• Heightened Awareness:
  • Through mindfulness and meditation, you can increase your awareness. You become more sensitive to the subtle energies and behaviors of others.
  • Pay attention to repetitive behavior patterns. Do you see someone consistently making the same mistakes or reacting the same way?
• Empathy and Compassion:
  • Try to empathize with the other person. Why do they exhibit this behavior? What fears or insecurities underlie it?
  • Observe with compassion, not judgment. Everyone carries their own baggage.
• Self-Reflection:
  • Ask yourself, “What aspects of this behavior do I recognize in myself?”
  • Be honest and confront your own shadow sides.

Grounding: Returning to the Basics

Grounding is essential for staying present and strengthening your awareness. Here are some ways to ground yourself:

• Contact with Nature:
  • Walk barefoot on grass, sand, or earth.
  • Hug trees, swim in natural waters.
  • Spend time in nature, free from distractions.
• Body Awareness:
  • Focus on your breathing.
  • Practice yoga or tai chi.
  • Eat grounding foods, such as root vegetables.
• Earthing:
  • Visualize roots extending deep into the earth.
  • Wear natural materials, such as cotton, linen, or wool.

By applying these techniques, you can enhance your awareness, recognize the patterns of others, and confront your own shadow sides. This allows you to use the mirror of humanity to better understand yourself and grow.

Following the application of these techniques, you can enhance your awareness, recognize the patterns of others, and confront your own shadow sides. This allows you to use the mirror of humanity to better understand yourself and grow.

Personal Insights and The Cycle of Projection

I’ve noticed that since I’ve started applying these techniques, I see my own light more clearly and understand my patterns better. It’s still challenging at times. I can imagine you might be thinking, “How am I supposed to recognize all this?” But I assure you, when you recognize patterns in yourself and others, you start seeing a kind of cyclical mirror. I call it the law of projection, or the law of mirroring. We all reflect back to each other what we still need to learn, what patterns we still carry.

Sometimes, people can become very upset with you, like my beloved partner, whom I love dearly and share my life with. He can sometimes become furious and say, “Mir, I really can’t stand this pattern; it really bothers me.” Often, I listen and realize that I’ve often displayed those same patterns. Unfortunately, it sometimes has to escalate between us. This is often how it goes in relationships, both with yourself and others. What I often do is avoid looking at myself and listening to myself.

The Pitfalls of External Focus

• Avoidance of Self-Confrontation:
  • It’s easier to point out flaws in others than to face our own.
  • We use others as a distraction from our internal struggles.
• Projection of Unresolved Issues:
  • We project our own insecurities and fears onto others.
  • This creates a distorted view of reality.
• Lack of Personal Accountability:
  • Focusing on others’ faults prevents us from taking responsibility for our own actions.
  • This stops personal growth.

The Importance of Self-Listening

The importance of listening to yourself is: I’ve noticed that when you listen to yourself and others regarding lessons, you gain more insight and self-reflection.

• Increased Self-Awareness:
  • Listening to your inner voice helps you understand your true needs and desires.
  • It allows you to identify and address limiting beliefs.
• Improved Relationships:
  • When you understand yourself better, you can communicate more effectively with others.
  • You can set healthier boundaries and avoid toxic relationships.
• Enhanced Intuition:
  • Listening to your intuition helps you make wiser decisions.
  • It guides you towards your true purpose.

Tips for Self-Listening:

• Practice daily meditation and mindfulness.
• Journal your thoughts and feelings.
• Spend time in nature and listen to your inner voice.
• Find a quiet space daily, to have time for yourself.

“When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.”

Shifting Your Perspective

So, stop saying “I hate people,” because then you hate yourself and refuse to see yourself. Instead, I find it helpful to say, “I dislike the patterns people exhibit.” Of course, say it as you wish, but as soon as you do, you stop conditioning yourself into a specific form. Because you stop pointing fingers and conditioning, you open up space for yourself.

I’ve personally experienced how much it helps to deal with various situations and myself by shifting from general statements like “I hate people” to focusing on specific patterns in others and, consequently, seeing those patterns in myself. You often encounter situations that offer lessons, and if you find yourself irritated, it’s frequently a sign that you need to examine something within yourself. However, this isn’t always the case. It can also indicate that you’re standing in your light in that area and need to set boundaries when others exhibit those patterns.

I encourage you to try saying, “I love myself, but these patterns need work,” or “I dislike these patterns in others.” You’ll start noticing patterns in both others and yourself, and you’ll also see yourself in a clearer light. Release these conditionings and connect with your true, authentic self. Being your true self in the present moment is who you are, your natural state, free from conditioning. Moreover, I’ve found that this approach fosters self-love and helps me embrace more of myself.

 Embracing Your Authentic Self

In essence, the journey from “I hate people” to understanding and accepting the patterns we all exhibit is a journey of self-discovery. By shifting our focus from general negativity to specific observations, we gain valuable insights into ourselves and others. This process allows us to break free from the chains of conditioning and embrace our authentic selves.

Remember, you are not defined by the patterns you or others display. You are the light within, the essence of your being. By acknowledging and addressing these patterns, you pave the way for greater self-awareness, self-love, and genuine connection with the world around you. Embrace this journey, and you’ll discover the true beauty of being yourself.